Brian's Review - Dinner for Schmucks

Stay for dinner, but don't expect dessert.

Released: 2010
Genre(s): Comedy

There's no denying Steve Carell's knack for character acting: "Anchorman," "The 40-Year-Old Virgin," "Get Smart," and more recently 2010's "Dinner for Schmucks." With such an impressive repertoire of goofiness under his belt, "Dinner for Schmucks" sets itself up as the perfect vehicle for Carell to let loose; it's just a shame that the rest of the film can't keep pace with his hilarious, high-energy performance. While not a badly written movie, it is rather inconsistent, with some moments popping with expected comedic wit and others feeling like uninspired afterthoughts. The juxtaposition between Paul Rudd's character (more straight-laced and downtrodden than most of his recent roles) and Carell's blundering idiocy frequently shows flashes of genius in what is oftentimes an underwhelming and overly-sappy storyline; indeed, even though this is a comedy, it unfortunately overreaches in its efforts to strike an emotional chord with its audience. Still, it is the characters that make this film worth watching, and it is through their performances that this movie's other shortcomings can be, at least momentarily, overlooked. Zach Galifianakis lends his talents especially well to the colorful cast of misfits, drawing on his uncanny ability to be both outlandishly amusing and unbelievably obnoxious at the same time. While it obviously lacks the cohesive charm and smarts of some of Carell's past endeavors, he still manages to make it a whacky and fun trip, and as far as dumb comedies go, this one can certainly hold its own.

Rating (out of 5): 3

Brian's Review - John Carter

Mars is beautiful this time of year.

Released: 2012
Genre(s): Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

Some may chastise me for saying it, but Disney's recent live-action films have been pretty inconsistent in quality, with most failing to meet expectations. While "John Carter" failed to universally impress critics, there's no denying that this is Disney's most entertaining live-action adventure yet, adapting the beginning of Edgar Rice Burroughs' Barsoom series into a sci-fi actioner that embodies what Disney is all about: fun. The movie's effects aren't the most imaginative, but they're above-average, breathing plenty of life into the many alien denizens of the red planet and its wide, sweeping environments. The action is frantic and done on a huge scale, channeling the frenzied madness of a video game - this film is honestly an action junkie's dream, throwing more explosions, massive battle sequences, and jaw-dropping set pieces at the viewer than any other Disney movie to date. Consequently, this is also one of Disney's most violent films of recent memory, unflinchingly embracing its PG-13 rating; however, most of the blood and gore (yes, gore in a Disney flick!) is CGI, coming off no worse than "Star Wars" or similar interstellar action romps. My biggest issue with all this is that John Carter himself comes off as somewhat of an unlikable thug, recklessly destroying and dismembering, completely inconsiderate in his capacity, even when he's attempting to help. It is this unfocused, brutish meandering about that makes his journey feel less meaningful than it should. Fortunately, due to this, it becomes obvious that "John Carter" does not take itself too seriously either, allowing indulgence in a certain level of sci-fi silliness, while never pretending that it's more important than it is. It's a simple kind of film, and it's well aware of this fact, but its presentation is dazzling and its execution is refreshingly bold for a company normally associated with animated features. It's an ambitious enough attempt to make you want to fly - or teleport - to this red world of breathtaking wonder.

Rating (out of 5): 3.5

Brian's Review - Survival of the Dead

If the living keep making movies like this, the dead really should survive.

Released: 2009
Genre(s): Horror, Action

George A. Romero's groundbreaking zombie apocalypse series has undeniably gotten worse with each new iteration, becoming more of a vehicle for the horror master's tongue-in-cheek social commentaries than a true scare fest. Unfortunately, this well-worn premise begins to really show its age quite noticeably in Romero's most recent attempt, "Survival of the Dead," cutting loose from any serious thematic elements and just losing itself to the predictable horror-action template that pumps out droves of immediately-forgettable movies each year. There's almost nothing here separating it from low-budget popcorn fodder, despite some rather feeble efforts to infuse subtle commentary regarding the current generation's brainwashed dependency on the internet. Beyond that, "Survival of the Dead" doesn't have much else to offer: the plot hinges on a preposterous Hatfields vs. McCoys-style feud, and much like the infamous conflict, the film feels mostly unnecessary and somewhat stupid. There's enough gun violence to keep action junkies happy, and enough over-the-top CGI gore to appease the more open-minded gorehounds (although there's really nothing extreme or realistic here), especially if they're willing to accept some of it as intentionally-cheesy comedic flourish. While the survivors' main objective is clearly self-preservation, I can't help but feel that there was no real urgency to their journey, and that - despite being in the middle of the end of the civilized world - they weren't in the least bit affected by their predicament. Then again, nothing in the movie feels particularly menacing, with slow, shambling zombies, who seem to attack in much smaller groups than in previous entries to the series, and gunfights breaking out so often that the battles lose any truly threatening impact. Even the main character seems bored with what's happening, unfazed by the multitude of explosions and computer-generated blood splatters emitting from headshot exit wounds. It's unfortunate that despite its prestigious lineage, "Survival of the Dead" operates with only enough creative momentum to generate yawns and zombie-like states of indifference. Unless you get some morbid satisfaction from seeing a Romero release limp along with other contemporary bargain-bin slop, I suggest finding another undead offering to get your zombie fix.

Rating (out of 5): 2

Brian's Review - The Presence

Don't go number two in the haunted outhouse.

Released: 2010
Genre(s): Drama, Thriller, Horror

The haunted house genre is one of my favorites by far - who doesn't fear what goes bump in the night, especially when said bumping occurs in your own presumably-safe abode? It's a concept that's been beaten to death, but unfortunately one that's rarely done well, with most films either sticking to formulaic templates or choosing to remake originally-terrifying Asian horror flicks as watered-down, brainless crap. "The Presence" gets some points for falling into neither of these categories, breaking the mold in both its presentation and pacing, but nothing beyond its own unorthodox approach allows it to have any true staying power. The cinematography is splendid here, highlighting still, brooding environments, while generating chills not through cheap jump-scares, but rather with subtle imagery and atmosphere. The slowly-swelling pacing of "The Presence" may turn off some: the character interactions are pretty limited for the first 20 or so minutes of this movie, with minor creepy moments occurring sporadically throughout, but things don't really start picking up until near the end. The big blank space that makes up the body of this film is used for some very clunky and mainly irrelevant backstory development, as well as a scene where the director tries to scare us with a shaking outhouse. Yes, you read that right: a shaking outhouse. While the marketing department for this movie attempted to sell "horror" as one of its sub-genres, this honestly borders on false advertising; the scares here are about as frightening as a napping kitten. Don't get me wrong - there's plenty of moments and situations that add legitimate creep-factor to this film, but "horror" this most certainly is not. "The Presence" has enough unconventionality to keep things at least semi-interesting, as I didn't ever consider turning it off, and actually wanted to find out what would happen next, but it really doesn't possess a profound enough punch to have any replay value. It could definitely be worth a rental to some (notice "some," not "all"), but probably shouldn't be the first choice on anybody's list. I sincerely applaud the efforts to go above and beyond the norm here, but, much like a shaking outhouse in the woods, it's only minimally frightening and mostly lame.

Rating (out of 5): 2.5

Brian's Review - 50/50 (2011)

50% comedy. 50% drama. 100% awesome.

Released: 2011
Genre(s): Comedy, Drama

Comedy-dramas are a hard sell: oftentimes, the comedy is soured by an overabundance of melodrama or fabricated cheese, or the humor overshadows whatever serious situation the story is attempting to convince us of, vastly deflating the gravity and atmosphere of what should be engaging and heartfelt. This is not the case for "50/50," a dramedy that's done so well it's just shy of perfection. The brilliant flow of this movie is never broken, dancing smoothly between genres, blending witty buddy comedy with naked moments of self-realization; the resulting emotional roller coaster has so many twists, loops, and drops that it's only natural to laugh, tear up, and cheer in equal measure. This genius combination is incredibly honest, and comes off as far more uplifting than emotionally exhausting. Minus Seth Rogen's pitch-perfect portrayal of an intentionally dopey (yet loyal) best friend, the cast is genuinely deep and realistic - realistic in their fragility and realistic in their varied reactions to the grimness of the world. Most impressive is Joseph Gordon-Levitt, who adds both commendable resilience and believable vulnerability to his character. The praiseworthy acting here is what drives this film forward, and it consistently manages to raise us out of the heavier plot elements without resorting to Lifetime-style sappiness. I can't help but feel that this is the movie Judd Apatow wanted "Funny People" to be, and in all honesty, "50/50" leaves Apatow's mortality-tackling endeavor in the dust. This is one of those rare films that can be enjoyed in a group, since the samplings here are bound to appeal to almost everyone. "50/50" is unmistakably a must-watch.

Rating (out of 5): 4.5

Brian's Review - The Green Hornet (2011)

Lacks any sort of sting.

Released: 2011
Genre(s): Action, Crime, Comedy

I have to be honest: I've never seen any of the original "The Green Hornet" TV episodes or earlier movies, but if they're anything like 2011's cluster-bomb of a superhero flick, then I'd prefer to avoid them. The film isn't the worst thing I've ever seen, boasting enough sleek special effects and quippy dialogue to keep the popcorn crowd at least mildly entertained; however, I'm not going to go as far as calling it a good movie. The goofy dynamic between Seth Rogen and Jay Chou echoes "Rush Hour," without relying on cheap stereotype-based humor to drive the comic repartee that makes up a majority of the character interaction here. This unfortunately - much like many of the initially enjoyable aspects of "The Green Hornet" - wears thin quickly, with Rogen's incessant babbling coming off more like the ramblings of an irritating, drunk idiot as this feature drags on. Christopher Waltz keeps things watchable as a delightfully evil, yet eccentric villain, but his screen time is proportionately minimal to the montage of redundant beatings, CGI explosions, and mundane car chases that comprise most of this film. Balancing this out more may have ironically allowed the villain to save the day (or in this case, the movie). Besides Chou (who portrays easily the coolest character in this film, if only due to his ability to kick massive amounts of ass) and Waltz, the supporting cast is inexplicably topped off by Cameron Diaz, who adds yet another notch to her belt of crappy action flick outings. I can't completely criticize the vision of this movie - it's style, set pieces, and tongue-in-cheek sensibilities are all in place - but the odd hodgepodge of excessive violence, "Knocked Up"-style wit-trading between characters, and unorthodox superhero origin story make this a hard pill to swallow, especially since no one genre is done especially well. It's honestly an adventure where nothing in particular starts it up, nothing in particular happens, and nothing in particular stays with you as the end credits roll. If anything, you'll want to see this film for the badass car - really almost a character by itself. Everything else just buzzes around like an obnoxious bug that would be a waste of time to even swat.

Rating (out of 5): 2

Brian's Review - Unknown (2011)

Knowing doesn't make this any less forgettable.

Released: 2011
Genre(s): Action, Mystery, Thriller

What was it about 2008's "Taken" that made it so entertaining and watchable? For me, it was the fast-paced, vicious action that culminated into one hell of a revenge flick; it was a movie that didn't try to hide itself behind smoke and mirrors, but embraced the fact that it was nothing more than a hyper-violent, trigger-happy power fantasy. Due to this, my reaction to the idea of another action-thriller starring Liam Neeson was naturally a positive one. While the premise of "Unknown" seems to have more in common with films like "Memento" than "Taken," the psychological thrills here are far less twisty and turny than similar entries into the genre: during this movie's entirety, save for a few choice moments, I couldn't help but feel like I'd seen this all before, and it wasn't a beaten path that served up much excitement beyond the by-the-numbers chase scenes of its predecessors. I'm in full support of the willing suspension of disbelief when watching a film, but the events here become increasingly disparaging as the mound of improbabilities relentlessly grows to gargantuan proportions. The action sequences are enjoyable enough, in that "stock footage" sort of way, but they're hampered by a start-stop dynamic that far too frequently rears its ugly head. This would be fine if there was any sort of mind-blowing reveal after all this slow burn pacing, but the ending feels so underwhelming and rushed that it leaves the screen as a generic anticlimax, instead of the sum of all its available parts. It's not bad, but you can rest assured that nobody will chastise you for letting this movie disappear into the unknown.

Rating (out of 5): 2.5

Brian's Review - Donnie Darko

Why are you wearing that stupid cult film suit?

Released: 2001
Genre(s): Drama, Mystery, Sci-Fi

Since its release in 2001, "Donnie Darko" has become one of the most recognized cult films of this century. Describing its following as "rabid" would be an understatement. While I can't agree with the die-hards who claim this is "the greatest movie of all time," I can acknowledge the mass appeal of this bizarre and macabre tale. The film includes blatant influences from horrors, psychological thrillers, science-fictions, comic books/graphic novels, and even coming-of-age teen dramas, and manages to effectively blend all these elements into a stylish and easily-digestible concoction. The plot plays around with dueling dynamics, ricocheting between the dark suggestions of Donnie's twisted visions to wildly-humorous social commentary that scrutinizes suburban American brainwashing in a manner that remains pertinent today. The visuals and atmosphere combine to create an incredibly bleak movie, growing uncomfortably heavy at times, but never becoming unbearable. Unfortunately, despite its wide range of inspirations and delightfully-disturbing outlook, the pacing is sometimes so uneven and disjointed that the film occasionally feels like a sloppy, meandering cluster of ideas without any focus. While it's undeniably enjoyable to watch Jake Gyllenhaal's character undergo what is easily one of the strangest stories of an angst-ridden teenager trying to find himself, the sci-fi-lite bones this film boasts of lack any true staying power, and the ultimate resolution of this tale, while mildly-profound and thought-provoking, hardly counts as genius. No doubt, "Donnie Darko" is a must-see movie, but its far from the very top of the list.

Rating (out of 5): 3.5

Brian's Review - Rachel Getting Married

A real circus wedding.

Released: 2008
Genre(s): Drama

The idea of a standard American wedding evokes images of delicate bouquets of roses, refined string quartets, and the occasional high-strung bridezilla. This is not the scene that unfolds for us in "Rachel Getting Married" - a story that is just as much about the joyous experiences of a wedding party as it is about familial redemption in the wake of a horrific tragedy. The film effectively manages to blend quasi-documentary-style cinematography with its substantial cast of quirky wedding-goers, causing the events to view a lot like an actual home video, which in turn makes the rampant dysfunction all the more visceral. This is all done without the plot straying too far into the realm of the melodramatic; instead, the only exaggerated emotion here is that which arises due to typical sibling rivalries, albeit on a more epic scale, but their reactions feel so natural that there's no sticky soap opera residue to scrub away to find these nuanced and talented performances, most notably from Anne Hathaway, who superbly embodies both the terms "jaded" and "snarky." The atmosphere throughout is such a bizarre mix of sound and color - mainly due to the engaged couple's unorthodox and eclectic wedding tastes - that, despite its efforts to produce uncanny parallels to reality, sweeps the viewer away into a surreal dream. It's difficult to watch at times, cranking out so many raw, adverse situations that the emotional gauntlet may prove too abrasive for some. This is made all the more taxing due to some of these scenes being drawn out to an unnecessarily excessive length, an affliction that unfortunately effects some of the more mundane moments as well. Still, the most brilliant instances here are the ones that showcase the human condition in its most naked of forms: "Rachel Getting Married" manages to be funny, uplifting, poignant, and infuriating all at once and all intentionally. It's not always pretty and it's not always enjoyable, but by the end of this wedding, you'll be glad you got the invite.

Rating (out of 5): 3.5

Brian's Review - Rio (2011)

A colorful, family vacation.

Released: 2011
Genre(s): Animation, Adventure, Comedy, Family

When animation and music come together in just the right way, the resulting combination can have a magical effect that proves enjoyable for both children and adults. Disney has proven over and over again that this formula can create films with almost infinite entertainment value. Blue Sky's "Rio" is one such concoction, although one not quite potent enough to be considered a timeless classic. Unlike the studio's monotonous, icy landscapes from its "Ice Age" series of movies, "Rio" is full of so much brilliant color that a Skittles warehouse would be jealous. Some seriously gorgeous visuals are melded seamlessly with the film's cartoony character models, a juxtaposition I'm actually surprised works so well. The animation is smooth and sleek, and it's expert execution manages to make the whole presentation eye-popping and effective, while the large dance scenes and action sequences pulse with so much vibrant life that it's impossible not to be mesmerized and amused in equal parts. The music itself is upbeat, poppy, catchy - a synthesis of Rio's Carnival celebration and today's chart-topping sensibilities - spanning across multiple genres, finding a way to remain massively-appealing despite its obvious quirkiness. The characters are fun, dialogue is witty, and the adventure is just big enough - and unorthodox enough - to remain consistently pleasant throughout. There's plenty of goofball slapstick to keep kiddies happy and parents will be able to appreciate the mild environmental commentary and shrouded adult innuendos: this is a very solid family film. Unfortunately, while this is definitely a fun and wild adventure, there's not a whole lot that really elevates "Rio" above what's par for the course; at its foundation, it's a very conventional outing. Even so, this is one ride that is well worth the cost of admission.

Rating (out of 5): 3.5

Brian's Review - Blue Valentine

It may be blue, but this valentine shines like gold.

Released: 2010
Genre(s): Drama, Romance

There's a lot wrong with the quality of the typical Hollywood romance film these days: unrealistic expectations, cardboard characters, contrived conflict, dumb-as-brick dialogue, and the list goes on and on. It's obviously enough to keep hordes of pent-up housewives and desperate teenage girls with delusions of what a "perfect" relationship is rushing to theaters, but the term "chick flick" does not carry the most positive of connotations, regardless of the financial success of such formulaic and shallow cinematic slop. It's here where "Blue Valentine" truly finds a way to stand out - there aren't any convoluted storylines, forced melodrama, or fairy princess ideals. Instead, we're served the rawest of movies, something that's unrefined and ugly, gritty and in-your-face, and ironically it's because of this that it can be described as genuinely beautiful as well. This film doesn't try to force-feed us someone else's artificial emotions, but lets us feel our own as we watch the powerhouse performances of Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams crackle like lightning across the screen. It's very rare that I see a movie allow its characters to remain this rough around the edges throughout its entirety. The acting here is like a thousand explosive pinball machines lighting up all at once; there's something almost perverse and very powerful about how candid every interaction, every reaction looks and sounds. While this complete lack of sensitivity to our comfort zones may turn off some, compared to the thoughtless, cookie-cutter mentalities of the standard romantic drama, this film is a dose of much needed reality. Just like a real relationship, "Blue Valentine" requires us to compromise and strain a bit to make it through its coarser moments, but the end product is one very rewarding experience.

Rating (out of 5): 4

Brian's Review - Midnight in Paris

You'll want to spend much longer than midnight here.

Released: 2011
Genre(s): Comedy, Romance, Fantasy

What is it about the past that draws us back into the art, music, and literature of days gone by, causing us to devalue the present? Were those events of yesteryear really grander, bolder, and more beautiful than today's societies, or have the history books morphed them into more elaborate moments of appealing majesty? These are the questions that Woody Allen's "Midnight in Paris" asks and consequently allows us to answer, albeit with a little biased help. Beyond questioning the dangers of melancholy, reminiscent obsession, the beauty of this film is that it ironically and intentionally does pay homage to literature's great writers through its whimsically nostalgic style and sensibilities. The characters are placed into one of two wonderful camps: comically-oblivious and close-minded, or enthusiastically-buoyant with sentimental awe; Owen Wilson in particular does a great job of embodying the amiable protagonist of this whimsical adventure of self-discovery, tackling his role with all the earnest gusto of a naive schoolboy. The cinematography is brilliant and Paris in both the daytime and the moonlight is as alluring and enchanting as the premise of this movie. Most importantly, it never takes itself too seriously, riding a wave of droll charm all the way from its onset to its finale. There are moments where "Midnight in Paris" drags its feet a little, aimlessly meandering through its plethora of romantic ideals, but in the end we're given a beautifully-crafted film that's just as smart as it is sincere.

Rating (out of 5): 4

Brian's Review - The Cat Returns

Worth returning to over and over again.

Released: 2002
Genre(s): Animation, Adventure, Comedy

When Studio Ghibli releases a film not directed by the great Hayao Miyazaki and dubs it for the English-speaking world, it's without a doubt a wild card situation met with supreme skepticism: there's always the potential that even the legendary animation studio will slip up and release something subpar (i.e. Goro Miyazaki's sweaty armpit of a debut "Tales from Earthsea"). The consistent, high-quality standard set by the studio's work is a mixed blessing, since every movie released under their banner has been scrutinized heavily under the magnifying glasses of both critics and fans alike. Although an earlier feature from the anime goliath's vast library of masterpieces, "The Cat Returns" easily fits into the pantheon of more recognizable titles, such as "Spirited Away" and "Howl's Moving Castle." Filled to the brim with rich, vibrant animation, the film barrels along with enough creative energy to put a dozen childhood fairy tales to shame. The entire cast of characters exudes an intoxicating charm, wit, and exuberant insanity that keeps things so entertaining it won't matter if you're watching this at the age of five or fifty, mostly thanks to the enthusiastic and talented efforts of the English dub cast. The adventure itself is wickedly outrageous, and the larger-than-life set pieces will thrill those looking for an action fix, without ever delving into anything much darker than a Saturday morning cartoon - true, this Studio Ghibli feature might feel too lighthearted and comedic for those who are used to Hayao Miyazaki's foreboding undertones and eerie imagery, but at its core, this is just as superb of a journey as its shadowy brethren. Outstandingly beautiful, genuinely heartwarming, and wildly exciting, this is the type of movie that will make you wish you had nine lifetimes to fill up with repeat viewings.

Rating (out of 5): 4.5

Brian's Review - The Thing (2011)

1982's original was something. 2011's prequel is nothing.

Released: 2011
Genre(s): Horror, Thiller, Sci-Fi

When John Carpenter released "The Thing" in 1982, it's combination of bizarre animatronic magic and nail-bitingly tense atmosphere was unsettling and jarring enough to generate a cult following of significant magnitude that still exists today. As an avid Carpenter fan, my enthusiasm for the 2011 prequel was mixed: would this movie be able to harness the same sheer, terrified energy caused by the unknown assailant from the original, or would Hollywood glam it up into a cheap, street-walking version of its former self? The answer is unfortunate, with "The Thing" of 2011 coming off as more of a soulless echo of the epic creature feature it could have been. Gone is the focus on suspense that made Carpenter's version, and Ridley Scott's "Alien" before it, so intense – no longer do we watch the characters carefully and meticulously explore their once-secure base, expecting horror around every corner, and no longer do said paranoid fixations cause them to unravel and implode; in reality, the characters in this iteration are almost as devoid of emotion as the creature itself. What we do get is plenty of in-your-face, close encounters with the alien, but it does less stalking of the survivors to build satisfying dread, and more brutal evisceration and mutilation. One might expect that this approach would yield more visceral, white-knuckle action sequences to make up for the lack of effectively chilling ambiance, but instead we're served a big, boring platter of dull, gray hack-and-slash. Even the CGI here is inconsistent - one moment, the effects appear lifelike and bold, the next, they become clumsy and ham-fisted, allowing even the outdated special effects of 1999's "The Mummy" to make them look like an elementary school art project. While the events that unfold during the end credits are a surprisingly bright light in this massive pool of sludge, the "too little, too late" rule applies here: ultimately, this "The Thing" is an ugly, plodding mess of slime, and unfortunately, I'm not just referring to the monster.

Rating (out of 5): 2

Brian's Review - The Lost Boys

Captain Hook never would've messed with these Lost Boys.

Released: 1987
Genre(s): Comedy, Horror, Fantasy

The '80s: oversized leather jackets, big sunglasses, and even bigger hair. Oh, and vampires, according to 1987's "The Lost Boys," a wild horror-comedy that does an incredibly effective job of being just as thrilling as it is outrageously funny, even two and a half decades after its inception. The cast is comprised of a veritable who's who of the era's teen stars, expertly conveying this film's goofball undertones by portraying panicked, high-strung adolescents. The tongue-in-cheek humor here is made all the more apparent by some enjoyably gruesome action, as the young protagonists battle a vicious vampire gang with weapons so appropriate for a group of comic book-reading, overly-imaginative teens that they practically shoot out silliness. The movie does a great job of not taking itself too seriously, but simultaneously slips in some delightfully disturbing and twisted mythology, and the atmosphere is never too far off from chilling. The normal corniness of the '80s is prevalent throughout this dark and delicious telling of small town vampire lore served Americana, but the execution and pacing of "The Lost Boys" keeps things interesting, while the laughs are all intentional, rather than an unfortunate byproduct of the generation's cheesier sensibilities. While I'd be lying if I claimed that the film has much (if any) substance, I can advocate for the fact that it's not a necessity for a movie like this: "The Lost Boys" is made for those who like cheap cinematic buffets, serving up horror, comedy, and just plain fun in satisfying portions; it never tries to be more than it needs to be. If you're getting sick of angsty, brooding, sparkling vampires, and prefer your creatures of the night to be loud, raucous, and rocking a pair of Ray-Bans, throw on this old-school laugh-and-thrill fest and enjoy a piece of the '80s that wasn't (quite as) awkward.

Rating (out of 5): 4

Brian's Review - Hugo

A marvelous invention created for all ages.

Released: 2011
Genre(s): Adventure, Drama, Family

Martin Scorsese has had one of the most lucrative and critically-acclaimed careers of any high-echelon movie maker within the past few decades, crafting films ranging from psychological thrillers to gangster dramas. His ability to infuse his works with honest emotion, instead of artificially coaxing it onto the screen, is a true gift and a consistent mark of quality that he continues with his family-friendly adventure "Hugo." Based on the historical fiction novel "The Invention of Hugo Cabret" (which I unfortunately haven't had the pleasure of reading yet), the movie spins a whimsical tale spanning the loneliness, curiosity, and sheer noble determination of a young boy. The brilliant execution here means the storytelling never dumbs itself down to infantile numbness, or hurls abrasive preteen angst at us, but stays universally-appealing through an artful and pleasant blend of humor, action, and wit. Enhancing this film's charm are its hauntingly beautiful visuals; at moments the cinematography is colorfully playful and bold, painting for us a Parisian wonderland, then suddenly it becomes almost eerie and sorrowful, a delightful dichotomy that truly expresses Scorsese's stylized vision. The world we're allowed to see is an absolute dream, one that manages to be enchanting and fantastical, while simultaneously remaining steeped in reality. How sincerely appreciative I am to have been served such a generous helping of magic, sans flying spell books or wild, mythical creatures roaming about. Instead, "Hugo" gives us exactly what we're looking for, a sentiment that mirrors a line within the movie itself: Hugo turns to one of his friends and utters "Machines never come with any extra parts, you know. They always come with the exact amount they need." This film is just such a machine.

Rating (out of 5): 4.5

Brian's Review - The Untouchables

Not quite untouchable, but an undeniable classic.

Released: 1987
Genre(s): Crime, Drama, Thriller

Crime movies - to be specific, mob-related movies - tend to capitalize on two major things to add onscreen punch: the acting and the whacking. Some are more balanced than others, doling out equal doses of moody, noir-esque grit, and wickedly brutal mob hits; it is this potent cocktail that makes "The Untouchables" such an enthralling blast to watch. The violence here isn't overdone, taking an approach that emphasizes style and atmosphere, instead of unsightly gore or gratuitous shock value; these scenes remain profound without delving into the realm of the gruesome. The vicious action sequences are done more to enhance the engaging story (loosely-based on Eliot Ness' autobiographical memoir the film derives its title from) than distract from it, which allows the viewer to focus on the superb, brooding, dramatic tension that builds between Ness and Al Capone's rival camps. While there are definitely moments where the plot drags its feet a bit - which is somewhat confusing, as the movie is wrought with historical inaccuracies (what does a little more embellishment hurt?) - the acting is consistently adequate enough to allow at least some of the momentum to continue through these scenes. Robert De Niro in particular personifies the sinister charisma of the infamous Chicago gangster in a portrayal dripping with both savagery and believable enthusiasm. Unfortunately, the grandest moments of this film are frequently plagued by a touch of unintentionally cornball grandiosity; most of this is due to a soundtrack that oftentimes seems more at home in a Mel Brooks movie than in a riveting crime-thriller. All nitpicking aside, there's plenty about this film that can effectively exhilarate, charm, and impress those seeking a crime-busting romp through the streets of the Windy City. If you're looking for a mob drama that's bearably dark, genuinely triumphant, and even quietly epic, "The Untouchables" is far from the worst choice available and shouldn't be passed up.

Rating (out of 5): 3.5

Brian's Review - A Turtle's Tale: Sammy's Adventures

Green turtles with a green message.

Released: 2010
Genre(s): Animation, Adventure, Family

Ever since the release of the brilliant "Finding Nemo" in 2003, I've been itching for another animated movie capable of doing justice to the gorgeous, sweeping ocean landscape and its various, bewitchingly beautiful denizens. "A Turtle's Tale: Sammy's Adventures" has the animation chops and family-friendly vibe necessary to stand out as something a bit more appealing than a simple imitation of the Disney/Pixar masterpiece. The CGI here is more than competent enough - in fact, it's downright impressive, especially in regards to the underwater environments full of lush, oceanic wildlife. The character models used for Sammy and his friends are fun and childishly charming and these appearances match their genial (and happily oblivious) personalities. The adventure itself unfortunately suffers from some bad pacing issues: never before have I seen such a linear film manage to remain so completely unfocused throughout its entirety. The movie manages to be equal parts whimsical, exciting, and disappointingly bland, inconsistently delivering entertainment value. In fact, the only theme that seems to hold the whole thing together is the eco-friendly, anti-polluting message that the viewer is constantly beaten over the head with. While I'm all about teaching our youth about important environmental issues, this sort of direct, unrelenting approach might turn off some older viewers simply trying to enjoy a silly family film with their children. Fortunately, the cuteness quotient here is substantial enough to make this journey worth taking, offering up plenty of enjoyably goofy situations and mildly perilous ones to captivate the attention of tykes for its duration, and enough commendably feel-good moments to keep everyone else at least moderately entertained. This may feel like a poor man's "Finding Nemo," but if you're looking for an undersea, family-friendly adventure, it may be worth it to take the plunge.

Rating (out of 5): 3

Brian's Review - The Secret World of Arrietty

A secret world worth exploring.

Released: 2010
Genre(s): Animation, Adventure, Family

Studio Ghibli is internationally known for pushing the limits of human imagination, creating worlds so rich with creative splendor that it's impossible to not get completely wrapped up in the onscreen magic. The backdrop conjured up for "The Secret World of Arrietty" doesn't embody the same sort of eerily haunting, supernatural whimsy of past projects (such as "Spirited Away"), but despite taking place within a setting that initially appears to be somewhat pedestrian in scope (a quiet, suburban household), Studio Ghibli's newest film still manages to feel pleasantly grandiose and ambitious. While events take place on a very small scale, due to the tiny size of the titular character, the action here is entertaining and wild in a very big way. The animation is beautiful, fluid, and on par with some of the studio's best works, inspiring wonder in every single frame - it's great seeing such a high standard of quality not just being set, but also met on a consistent basis. The story might not break as much ground as Studio Ghibli's previous works, but this is still an enjoyable reimagining of author Mary Norton's children's book "The Borrowers" that packs a truly genuine message. The combination of excellent voice acting, stellar animation, and unmistakable Studio Ghibli charm makes this a family-friendly movie that is definitely worth a watch. While not quite perfect, this film is heartfelt and endearing enough to be enjoyed by audiences of all ages, and that universal appeal alone makes it a must-see for a random weekend evening.

Rating (out of 5): 4

Brian's Review - Green Lantern

The light from this lantern is disappointingly dim.

Released: 2011
Genre(s): Action, Adventure, Fantasy

It's officially been a Hollywood fad for some time now: superhero movies are cash cows and they saturate the market more heavily than butter in a Paula Deen recipe. I can't deny their appeal and have to admit that as far as fun, action blockbusters go, I'm consistently excited when I see a new entry being advertised. While not my favorite DC superhero by any stretch of the (very nerdy) imagination, Green Lantern is still an icon of vast importance in the comic book world, so my hopes for this film were high (or as high as they can get for a superhero movie). Plus, Christopher Nolan did manage to exceed all my expectations with his reboot of the Batman film franchise, winning some major points for DC's corner. Perhaps I set myself up for disappointment, but "Green Lantern" ended up being especially mediocre for a movie with such a rich mythology to base itself upon. Although "Green Lantern" attempts to mimic the technique that other recent superhero origin films have utilized to update themselves into pertinence, it does so rather unsuccessfully, lacking any true originality or creativity; the writing feels sloppy, rushed, and drab. Characters who traditionally play pivotal roles in DC lore are briskly introduced without any explanation or true background, and are then quickly killed off or diminished in an equally unceremonious fashion, serving essentially only as filler pieces. The dialogue comes across as dry, shallow, and witless, with even the snarky charm of Ryan Reynolds barely having any impact on a cast of characters incapable of spewing out anything but prefabricated cardboard. Geoffrey Rush even lends his vocal talents to the movie, doing the best he can with a patchwork script seemingly written by a team of middle school geeks, but his efforts barely make a difference, due to a very minuscule role. There are some enjoyable action sequences here, and some pretty decent effects, although the entire experience drips with such an overbearing amount of cheese that many of the fight scenes are dissatisfying and underwhelming. With an unfortunately anticlimactic and just plain unexciting plot, shallow dialogue, and an unintentionally corny atmosphere pervading throughout, the only things holding this film together are some entertaining digital effects, pulse-pounding set pieces, and a deep mythos to fall back on; without these aspects, this would be another highly-avoidable movie, but with them it's at least tolerable enough to watch from start to finish. If you're a comic book fan, you might be down to strap on some green, glowing tights and fly into outer space alongside "Green Lantern," but everyone else will probably want to wait for a different hero to take up the mantle of justice.

Rating (out of 5): 2.5

Brian's Review - Professor Layton and the Eternal Diva

The age-old mystery of how to create a good video game movie has been solved.

Released: 2009
Genre(s): Animation, Adventure, Mystery

For years, the thought of films based on video games made audiences and critics alike cringe, hide under their covers, and even cry in a combination of depression and terror; honestly, with movies like 1993's "Super Mario Bros." and every Uwe Boll production ever made being the most prominent examples out there, it's no wonder the idea became an industry joke. Hollywood has a strange obsession with dismantling awesomely epic video game storylines and reassembling them as cruel, laboratory experiments made up of various blockbuster clichés, barely resembling shadows of their former selves. Fortunately, every now and then, a film escapes directly from the shores of Japan and manages to make its way to our theaters and DVD players relatively unscathed, restoring my faith ever-so-slightly in the belief that someday a video game movie will have the power and depth to transcend the embarrassing stigma currently plaguing the genre. "Professor Layton and the Eternal Diva" is one such film. I'm a huge fan of the Nintendo DS-based puzzle game series under the Professor Layton title, and I was delighted to learn that the legendary studio Level-5 decided to create an original, feature-length anime adventure starring its enchanting characters, free of their gaming system confines; the games already contain beautifully-animated cutscenes, hilarious voicework, and whimsical plots that I've always felt would translate perfectly onto the silver screen. This movie does not disappoint - the animation is gorgeous, lush, and alive, drawing on a luscious color palette, giving the entire presentation a light, cheerful feel. CGI effects are tastefully integrated into the animation, seamlessly enhancing the onscreen excitement. The dubbing is eloquent and expertly executed, while the musical score is just as delightfully playful as it is in the games, bringing to mind thoughts of quaint, European countrysides and windup jewelry boxes. The puzzles - a staple of the game series - are cleverly and effortlessly worked into the mystery of the story, without feeling forced whatsoever. Just like the Professor Layton games upon which it is based, the light-hearted outward appearance of this movie masks much deeper, thought-provoking subject matter, frequently focusing on darker themes, including human mortality and the many gray areas of morality. While not a true masterpiece, it's nice to see that a film finally got the formula right: "Professor Layton and the Eternal Diva" could have been one hell of a fun video game, but instead manages to be one hell of a great video game film.

Rating (out of 5): 4